52 Intentional Affirmations:
#14. I intentionally encourage people to have their say!
This week I will intentionally strive to be less argumentative.
Each week I’m reporting here on my personal experience in implementing my 52 Intentional Affirmations. These are designed to help us be more intentionally mindful of the impact our intentions have on living a happy, flourishing and prosperous life. (Click Here to start work on your own 52 Intentional Affirmations).
We were blessed this week to have two friends visit us from the country. Both ladies are in their late 60’s and both sadly have had their husbands die from Cancer in the last couple of years. What a joy it was however to be able to openly chat about the times we have all spent together, and yes, there was laughter and a few tears (some from laughter and others from sad reflection of lives lost too young).
One of my friends has the habit of constantly jumping in on a conversation while someone else is speaking. She means absolutely no disrespect and even goes so far as to say as soon as she interrupts the conversation… “Sorry to speak over top of you there but… ” and then continues on with what it is she wants to say.
I know that this is something I have been working on with my own conversational skills for many years now. When I’m presenting a workshop and there’s interaction from the audience, I’ve long recognised the importance of letting the audience member finish what it is they are saying. It shows respect and professionalism to do so. And in my personal life, especially when in conversation with my sons, I recognise the importance of letting them finish their sentences and need to resist the urge to ‘teach’ too quickly, rather than listen and learn from what they’re saying (and what they’re not saying as well at times).
So as this week’s affirmation constantly appeared on my iPhone start-up screen, reminding me to shut up and not be argumentative and to encourage people to have their say, once again I found it a wonderful intentional default that pattern interrupts my day to ensure I can take stock of my truth, set my intention and have much more meaningful conversations.
By nature of the environment within which I was raised as one of five brothers with no sisters, we are naturally competitive siblings. And while that can be fun at times, when it often broke down to sarcasm and then arguments, it wasn’t all that pleasant.
One of the 9 inescapable truths for a prosperous life outlined in the Intentionomics Blueprint is to Define your intention for each life role. This has been such a positive help for me in some of the relationships I have. When you’re clear on your intention for the other person and you take intentional action that demonstrates that intention, magic can happen in relationships – whether in your personal or business life.
My eldest brother Chris and I haven’t always had the positive relationship that we enjoy today. What changed it all was when I got clear on my intention for Chris. You see, Chris is my older brother, but I never realised how important that role actually is for him – to be my older brother. Because if he’s not my older brother, then what relationship does he have with me? Unfortunately I didn’t realise this for some time, and so, I never treated him as an older brother. Now, and I’m not playing a game in any way, I let Chris be the older brother – because he is. This is my intention for him… to allow him to be my older brother.
The result is we have far less arguments. In fact, I can’t remember the last time Chris and I argued, and I do remember we used to argue almost every time we spoke either face to face or on the phone.
I am so grateful for my relationship with my older brother Chris and how it has developed over the years.
What about you? How clear are you on your intention for those in your life. Who might you have in your personal life who has a ‘life-role’ that you’re not allowing them to live up to?
It’s an interesting perspective and it all comes back to the power of intention.